Meet Me in the Middle

Photo by Ozan Safak on Unsplash

because I respect you as you respect me, too

Many people believe in things that do not make any sense, such as sleeping with or without their socks on. Same fruitful event yet different approaches make it seem like a legitimate interdimensional difference in one’s world. How we sleep affects the way we wake I guess, or the dreams we have. Not long ago, I have figured everyone had a different approach to things, not only sleep but things in general. You might tend to think waking up early is the best way to approach to life yet your neighbor might get more things done than you do even when he or she wakes up later than you.

It is sometimes a given fact that a person who gets done more ends the day well, hence sleep well. However, here you get yet another slap on your face by another thought-provoking opposite idea, what if someone who gets more things done in a day who also wakes up late – that is very not the type of thing you can accept- fails to finish all the chorus with couple of mistakes here and there? Now we have three questions in total so far.

1- Who gets up early?
2- Who gets more things done regardless of what time the parties wake up?
3- Who gets more things done better than the other regardless of what time the other party wakes up and how many things they get done?

I hope you can see how everyone can approach this differently. When one can confidently think waking up the earliest is the most important, another can get all the work faster. How about the third one who gets everything done peeerfectly? Each on his own, for sure. This is absolutely not an article to discuss which one is the most important. This is an article to raise at least a little bit of an awareness about how people differ among their own natures. We cannot expect everyone to think the same because no one is the same. No one, absolutely no one had the same childhood, neither has everyone grown up in the same family or have been to same places at the same time. Not everyone will be exactly the same person who has learned and applied the same values, love, approach and respect to the same things as you do. Please, understand this. Write it in your soul. Tattoo it on your skin. If we all cared about the same exact things as everyone else around us, we would all be robots. You are not a robot, just like how your neighbors are not robots, or your co-workers, friends, family members, classmates are not robots. We might be getting more robotic, true but we still have our own personal past memories where the line has been drawn in certain things and acts.

Sure we would love to see someone who cares the about the environment as much as you do, yet the truth is that is all a fantasy. Think about it, no one has the same tongue. The shapes and all are all different. You might taste the same orange but what difference does it make if you are both tasting that orange differently? Are you on the same page? Never 100%. Some people see the dress in gold, some pink, some blue. Can you change that? No. You love animals to a point where you would die to save one animal while some people hate those same animals that you care so deeply for. I believe that is where the term, ethics can help us. Ethics can help us in a way to get along with each other in a society with some certain basic laws. If your heart is broken by someone who does not care about your relationship as much as you did, you cannot blame that person one hundred percent. You do not know what kind of a devastating last break up that person had gone through. You do not even know that person’s strengths and weaknesses that are never truly shown. Relationships, partnerships, family relations, they are all the same.

Take a look at psychology. Everyone faces their past to fix their future mistakes or at least to minimize them. Take a look at astrology. If your Saturn is in your fourth house and meets Uranus at some certain angle where it is also affected by the angle of Mars in YOUR chart, you get a divorce. Don’t compare yourself to your friends. Your chart is different, just like your past, so will be your future.
Take a look at someone’s educational background, lost pets, daily routines, daily dosage of good new and bad news they get or do not get. You can’t be them. They cannot understand you fully. You are you, they are them. When I lost my job one rainy day, after crying for hours over it, I took the train to go back home to do some more crying and thinking. There were all these dancers on the same cart as mine who were performorming for everyone there to collect money. As much as I wanted to appreciate their happy vibes, I was just not on the same level with them. I did not have to be in any way. One of them got very pissed at me for not watching them only to yell at me more, put me down more, curse at my face. He almost hit me for not watching them. I on the other hand had had so much for that day, I could not participate in his freak show aggression against me in public. I reminded myself over and over again, he did not just get fired from his one and only job, I did. Look, he did not even ask me if I was having a good day. All he expected from me was for me to watch him perform his dance and spare change. What he did not realize was that I could bet he had more money than me at the time. We were different. I did not expect him to understand me, so I let it go. He wanted so desperately for me to understand him, so he stuck his nose in my life. He got angry, I had zero emotions for his overreacting act of playing it cool in public.

Here, it is not about accepting and forgiving a person, no. Because if and as you do that, you give a piece of yourself, your thoughts, your attention and time to that particular person. Instead, turn to yourself to understand yourself. If the other person wants to understand you as well, then all the doors of the universal love opens up. The force becomes the love and mutual understanding. Only then, only by telling and listening both parties can see how different they are from each other. It does not matter what color of socks you sleep in as long as you are responsible enough to get what you need to get done for the day. I believe by taking responsibility for your own actions, respecting the others, there is no mountain you cannot hike. Every action has a reaction. Listen to your words, read your own chart, others will follow with their own. Imagine a world where everyone meets in the middle. 🙂

Live the Life of a Tree 🌲

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We rise, we fall. Life is as it is. It is all in the details. How do we fall? Who helps us to rise? Blah blah.

Now let’s get to the point, HOW MUCH? Questions to consider;

1- How much money does it cost?

2- How much time do you need to make it/ break it?

3- How much of an experience do you need?

4- How much of a time gets wasted in the process?

5- How much of it do you lose to gain? To rise to fall?

We all read or at least hear from time to time about those accommodating self-help books, motivational speeches as well as the inspirational movies. Every year there are millions of them being marketed, promoted, read or watched. However, how much of it REALLY sticks with us? How much of that motivation do we end up letting go at some point? How many DIY videos does it take to actually do everything yourself? One? Million?

Whether or not it is all or nothing, some or none, we eventually, inevitably, respectfully are stuck with ourselves. It is like a tree. Imagine this.

There is a huge forest in front of you. It is a mixture of every shade of brown and green. Bushes, logs everywhere. Some birds are on the tree branches, some flying in the sky. Leave the sky and flying birds there for the sake of now, but focus on the brown and green. If you really want the color blue, put a waterfall in your imaginary forest between the tall green trees. Waterfall gives you the sound of … nature, let the water flow. Listen to the birds singing, wind blowing through the leaves in the forest. You have leaves under your feet crunching. Smell.. Smell the forest in front of you. Do you smell the trees, wildflowers, perhaps the water that travels to tip of your nose by the warm wind. Walk through the trees, touch them, let all the forest go happy feet on your skin. Look up to the trees and take a deep breath. Now, pick a tree. Sit right across from it. Pay attention to the birds on or around it. Any soft spider webs you can spot in the sight? Good. Sitting across from this one tree you picked, now you are to think some very important similarities between trees and humans. Fasten your seatbelt. Ready, set and here we go!

That tree was not there at first. Think about it. Someone had to plant it there. Seeds come in all sort these days, but this is a big big tree in a big big forest. Now, that tree was a small baby tree at some point. It needed all the water, rain, sunshine to become what it has become. Most importantly, that tree had to/ still has to go through a period of losing its leaves either one by one process, or all bunch at the same time. Some birds were fed by that tree, for some it has been a shelter only. It has also been a spiritual bond to some, who knows? Overall, for that tree to be there with the other trees, it had to become all the other things first. How similar we are! How death, shelter, survival, water, stress, time, surroundings, friends, grounded roots have different values to us!

At some point in my life, I seriously thought that the reason why the trees were created was for the humanity to watch, get closer to examine and learn from. Rather than making it all complicated however, trees make it seem simple to be living things. Stare at a tree from a distance and as close as you possibly can. Survival seems cool for them. Simply they survive, they grow. They rise, leaves fall. They rise, and fall again.

They do not seem to care how much.. Neither do they seem to care with which trees they are surviving with. They go green, they go through dark malicious nights, then orange and red, so that they are back to their green colors again. A tree will survive until a person destroys its life either for money or his/her own survival. A tree will fall down to the ground if it was planted in a wrong environment by a person. A tree is a tree. A leaf is a leaf. A person is a person. Survival is survival with or without how much of a survival it is. Maybe, not all is that bad for us. Maybe, life is worth to live and die for.

May it be a green lush one with birds singing on your branches, waterfalls traveling their way to new destinations and a sunlight kissing your face. Say thank you to your imaginary tree now and go back there when you need to remember that we are all, at least biologically living things. We rise, we fall living the things.